Send out the search party.

So, I am going through quite a mess. I have been spending a lot of time with B and it has pretty much killed my sugar game. I know full well I do NOT want a relationship but my time with B is just so enjoyable, its hard not to want to drown myself in it. The sex is great, we are super comfortable, and we both have an understanding of where the other is in life. If he could challenge me intellectually, I would be all over this boy demanding a relationship but honestly, I feel like I have the intellectual upper hand. Looking back, I normally have had the upper hand in my relationships, but since I started sugaring I have gone absolutely crazy with the idea of someone teaching ME something and not vice versa. Not to say I could not learn from B, he has had some serious shit go down, but could I learn from him in a way that would benefit me in the future career wise or personal growth wise? Probably not. DAT BODY DOE.

I have started talking to China again as June is nearing and I figured I put up with it this long, just the final home stretch before he flies down for the date. He is still a very dry sort of guy but that could just be how it goes when communicating via email.

I had a date planned with Karate Kid this passed thursday but after staying up the previous night until almost 1am talking and sexing with B, I was in no mental state to put up with anyone. I made up a plausible work excuse and ended up being sick yesterday so that actually REALLY cancelled that one out. Sucks. I am going to really revamp my sugar game this weekend and stop being distracted by B as it is not going to go anywhere, I won’t allow it to.

There are two others in the mix, that new york guy and some guy I can’t even remember his name I just know his texts are hilarious. Where is he from again? Hmmmm….

I still have not heard from my SD and I am getting rather impatient, almost a little scared he changed his mind. The last time we spoke was a chain of 50 or so emails in an hour time span, talking about how excited he was to get back in to town and then suddenly nothing? Not a good sign my dears, not a good sign.

I am off to a food truck festival today to get rid of all the work I constantly put in at the gym! No regrets! PULLED PORK AND CUPCAKES WILL BE HAD!


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